What has the Married Felon Learned?

What have I learned from this experience? I will start with my marriage. I do not believe a traditional marriage counselor is equipped to competently advise a felon about his marriage. Without direct subject knowledge of the felony experience, coping with the dreadful expense of defense, standing before a judge to face sentencing and incarceration, or the total destruction of livelihood, an uninitiated therapist is not a compatible resource. When I graduated through the five stages of grief, came to grip with the reality of being a felon, and identified the things I will never surrender: my mind, love or relationships, to the criminal justice system, my focus became crystal clear. I shared this blog with my wife, and it served as the outline for our discussion of how to save our marriage.

I have no criminal history, and I have never asked the government for a handout until the pandemic. When the government locked down the economy and became the lender of last resort, I applied for funding from the Small Business Administration (SBA) for my businesses.

My intent as a small business owner was to save my life’s work. I was crippled by the government’s economic lock down. I was not allowed to evict tenants and forced to keep rents below market as a result. I was not able to rent my luxury short-term units, finance the sale of my short-term contracts, or offer luxury concierge services. I worked without compensation in my property management business. I applied for funding from the SBA, and when my loans were approved, I started paying back the money ahead of schedule. When I became aware of the government’s criminal investigation against me, I decided the best course of action was to cooperate and negotiate a plea agreement quickly. I sold my business interests and paid my restitution in full. The first question in lesson one of the ‘Straight-A Guide to Mitigation Program,’ by Prison Professors, is important, “What has the defendant learned from this experience?”

Is the lesson: I misrepresented the financial information I reported on my loan applications that I submitted to the SBA, I deprived other worthy business owners the opportunity to secure funding, and I harmed our federal government and my fellow taxpayer in the process? Despite the SBA emergency loan program is ongoing, ultimately, the answer is simply, “Yes,” and I will never let it happen again.

Does the lesson go much deeper? It seems to me a toxic business environment has developed since the start of the pandemic. In retrospect, it would have been better to permanently close my doors. When the SBA offered small business owners a helping hand, I jumped at the chance, but it ended up being a disastrous choice. I will never borrow money from the government again under any circumstance. I am able to immediately contribute to society upon my release from prison if the judge decides incarceration is the answer. I have already decided I will permanently shutter my business if our country faces another disaster of this magnitude. I will never appear in court as a defendant again.

I fully understand the prosecutor will most likely paint me in the worst light possible to the judge, and any amount of effort on my part will probably go unnoticed. All I can do is practice what I believe. I will let my actions speak louder than my words, I will cooperate, I will accept responsibility for my actions and the crime, I will pay all of my restitution before sentencing, and I will instruct my attorney to retain expert counsel to assist the court in the distribution of restitution towards the retirement of my SBA loans. I will do everything in my power to make this right; I will leave nothing on the table. It was my choice to borrow money from the SBA, and I will face the consequences. One thing I know, I will never appear in court again.

Is the lesson an affirmation to avoid leverage? I have always believed the only debt worth having is income producing debt. I never carry a balance on my credit cards, I always pay off my secured debt early, and I reinvest proceeds into my business at every opportunity. This strategy has served me well over the years, and has served me well during this criminal investigation. I loathe the idea of being incarcerated while owing the government money. I will never stand in front of a judge again.

Does the lesson confirm the best way to grow my business is slow and steady? I didn’t use the loan proceeds to buy personal luxury items, but I didn’t spend it on approved SBA business expenses either. At the time, I tried to follow the SBA guidelines concerning acceptable expenditures, but I clearly failed in this responsibility. In the future, I will adopt a slow and steady model of business growth, and never borrow money from the government under any circumstance. I will never face a criminal prosecution again.

It is straight forward: I was a successful small business owner, I borrowed money from the SBA, I promised to pay back what I borrowed, the government lost faith in my promise and ability to repay, it resulted in a criminal investigation and prosecution, I reached the sobering realization that it was futile to challenge the might of our government, I instructed my attorney to negotiate the best plea possible, I fully cooperated, I paid 100% of my restitution before sentencing, and now I await sentencing and possible incarceration. I cannot help feeling, “America has become a dangerous place to do business,” but it’s my country too. I will rebuild! My wife expects nothing less of me. This journey has been the most unpleasant experience of my life, and I will never repeat it.

I asked my wife, “What have we learned from this experience, and how are we going to overcome?” My wife was lost in contemplation for a moment, and she said, “You love me and love being married. I want to read you diary to know what you’re thinking, it will keep you positive, and give me the strength to keep going and take care of my parents. Your blog will help us.”

I’m beginning to realize the sentencing mitigation process can impact my marriage in a positive way. I will never betray this woman, and I will never return to court again.