Blessed Despite It

Most days I am positive, but sometimes I fail horribly ... that’s on me, not you. I hate it when I’m not strong enough to hold it together for the 15 minutes we have together each day. It is an honor to trust in our relationship to carry the day, but it is a moment of weakness, nonetheless. I do well most days, though. Don’t give anything more to them. Don’t weep, get frustrated, or panic. The BOP does not deserve any of these emotions. My intention is not to stress you out if we can’t connect or if we can’t hear each other on the phone. I always have tomorrow, if we don’t connect for our 15-minute call together. I will miss the conversation for that day, but all is not lost. I simply look forward to the next day. The only favor I ask is that you keep the phone near so we can talk. My desire is to come home better than before, and I hold that in my heart like buried treasure.

Your plan to build a better self by enrolling in the self-mastery course is great. I like the new church you described that is close to home, and I like the way you’re keeping everyone happy and strong in my absence. I couldn’t be prouder to be your missing half. Stay strong for us and practice patience too. Remind everyone to pray for our needs. I received an email from my brother explaining his plans to travel abroad and that he keeps me in his prayers. The rest of the family who also sends emails are praying for me, too.

I am blessed more than I deserve - even in prison. It still feels funny to speak this way, but it’s what we have and so I speak.